Time Stands Still
by Casteline
Summary: Racine's buddies wanted payback. Tag to 2x21 Den of Thieves. Sort of companion to Bare, but it's not really necessary to read that. Ryan/Esposito slash. Dark-fic


Disclaimer: blah blah blah, generic disclaimer here.

Takes place a few months after Den of Thieves. Spoilers.

* * *

**Time Stands Still**

_When his first partner was killed by Racine, Esposito spent months trying to find some charge to stick him with. Anything that will land him in prison._

_But there was nothing to pin on him. There was almost no evidence against him._

_Things went a little different the second time around._

"My sister wants to meet you," Kevin said from the passenger seat of Javier's car as they head home after a particularly long day.

"What?" Javier asked.

"She wants to meet you," Kevin shrugged.

"She knows about us?"

"Yeah. She's known a while."

"Oh. Okay."

"I'm going out to lunch with her this weekend," Kevin said. "You should come along."

"Sure," Javier said, though his voice isn't agreeing with the words.

"You don't sound it."

"It just… Well, it's your family, Kev. What if I say something stupid and they hate me?"

Kevin stared at him, mildly amused. "You girl," he said, laughing. But it'was only a moment before he's serious again. "You won't… Okay, you probably will say something stupid, but they'll still like you. They're chill people. Unless you try and attack them with a potato peeler then try and set the house on fire, you're good."

Javier nodded absently for a moment, then turned his eyes off the road and gave Kevin a strange look.

"What?" he asked as Esposito parked the car.

"That was an oddly specific example. Like, maybe you're speaking for experience?"

Kevin sighed. "I was fifteen okay. The guy I was with at the time was a little… intense. My little brother said something he didn't like and he kinda freaked," he tried to shrug it off.

"And I'm just now hearing about this?" Javier laughed slightly.

"Well, it's not exactly one of my shining moments," he replied as they got out of the car.

Javier opened his mouth to speak, but before the words came, both detectives got the sense that something was off. Time slowed considerably as they turned to the car about to drive past them, a large gun poking out of the rear window.

"No," Ryan whispers, jumping in front of Esposito just as the bullets hit.

The car is gone in a millisecond. Kevin falls into Javier's arms and they both sink to the ground.

"Kevin!" Javier shouted, holding him in his arms. Kevin's breathing was shallow and jagged. His chest was riddled with bullets, to many a person could survive. Time stood still as Javier called 911 and held tightly onto Kevin, begging him to stay awake.

"Come on Kev, say with me," he pleaded. "Please."

Kevin's eyes blinked slowly. He was hardly conscious.

"You… 'kay?" Kevin asked weakly.

"I'm fine," Javier said, tossing the phone aside, not even noticing the bullet lodged in his arm. "It's you I'm worried about."

"I feel like Swiss cheese," Kevin giggled, his voice barely above a whisper. He felt so weak. He closed his eyes.

"Come one Kev, open your eyes, stay awake. Please stay with me."

"Jus' gonna… rest my eyes a bit," Kevin replied.

"You gotta stay awake," Javier shook him back into the realm of the conscious.

"Hum?" he mumbled.

"Gotta stay awake," he repeated.

"Mmkay." Kevin said, resting his head against Javier's chest and closing his eyes again, a small smile on his face.

"Kev!"

"Love you Javi," Kevin whispered in return.

"Don't you dare start talking like a dead man. I love you too, but you gotta open your eyes Kev, stay with me. You can't sleep."

"But 'm so tired."

"Doesn't matter Kev, ya gotta stay awake."

Kevin doesn't respond.

"Kev?" Javier said. "Kevin!" he tried to shake him awake again, but he got no response. "Kevin?"

He pulls him close, tears falling freely down his face.

The next several days barely register in his mind. The paramedics arrived, but it was too late, Kevin was gone. Beckett and Castle and Lanie and the Chief might have been there, but he honestly can't remember.

He vaguely remembers the investigation, but everything is a blur.

The only thing he remembers clearly is the moment he finds out who was responsible for Kevin's murder. Some of the guys who used to work for Racine got pissed, wanted Esposito to be punished for taking out their boss. Ryan just got in their way.

He clearly remembers leaving the precinct the moment he figured it out. He sorta remembers Beckett following him, trying to stop him from doing something stupid. She must not have tried very hard.

He remembers, with perfect clarity, the moment he killed the men responsible for his partner's death.

After that everything's a blur again. He knows he let Beckett arrest him and he knows there was a trial and that he pleaded guilty. He killed 4 men. He was guilty.

He knows there a prison cell waiting for him and he's going to be stuck in it for the rest of his life. He knows that a cop in prison doesn't ever go well. Lots of criminals hold grudges. He knows that being stuck in prison the rest of his life will probably not be all that long.

He doesn't really care.

_Okay, so I know that I'm generally a depressing writer, but this is extreme, even for me. I can't remember the last time I wrote something this bad._


End file.
